Welcome to AndreaFisher.com.au
Hello and welcome.
My name is Andrea Fisher and I am a qualified social worker, counsellor and trainer based in Shepparton, Victoria.
On this website you will find information about my services and also find some informational resources and products that can help you with stress management and relaxation.
Just what is this Manifesting or Law of Attraction hype you and I have been seeing?
Well, it basically means thinking about what you really want and making it happen. It is a simple technique you can apply to bring success (however you define it) into your life – health, wealth, abundance, happiness, freedom which includes everyday important goals that you and I want to achieve.
For example, some time ago I was coaching a client who had decided to apply for an employment position she had really wanted for some years. My client knew she could do this job, but previously she had not been given the opportunity to prove this.
My client (Let’s call her Suzy) conducted all the research she could about this job, the employer and the statutory requirements which impacted on this position then, duly wrote her application letter and addressed the required key selection criteria and mailed it off.
All the time Suzy was preparing this, she kept repeating to herself “this is my job, this is my job”. During the waiting time, she completed further research on this job, all the while repeating “this is my job” then, she received an email informing me that her application was successful and had moved on to the interview stage.
Then, self doubt struck. She says she thought…. “do I really want this? Could I do this? Of course I could, I had gotten this far hadn’t I?” Then Suzy had to collect all her self doubts and throw them away. Positive thinking came to the forefront. She took a deep breath, squared her shoulders, held her head high and walked forward with confidence.”
So, again Suzy repeated her mantra: “this is my job, I can do this and do it well” was repeated over and over again. The interview went extremely well, so well that she got “her dream job”.
Can you see the processes Suzy followed to make it happen?
What I am telling you here, is that you need to set goals, start off with smaller ones at first if you are not sure, then as you achieve these, grow to bigger and better things.
All the hype tells us that you have to think long and hard about what you want and where you want to be and it will happen.
But, what will actually happen, will you still be wishing and hoping for what you wanted?
You – yes you, have to actually go out and do something about it. The adage “all good things come to those who wait” has to become: “all good things come to those who go out and make it happen.”
Don’t just sit back and rest, you could be sitting on that rock for a long time.
I actually journal the process to get there, plan it out. What do I want? To get there, work out the steps that you need to make to get yourself to the point where there is even the slightest possibility of it happening. Cross off each small step as you achieve it and give yourself a pat on the back for getting there.
Then, and this is the big one, once you are at that point, what do you need to do to actually make it happen – to bring it to fruition?
Again, put your goal on a piece of paper and plan the final stages of the journey to get there.
Surround yourself with like minded people who can buoy your efforts and keep sustaining the momentum. It is very easy to shrug your shoulders and give up when nothing happens straight away.
Don’t become disheartened, some people never even get to the stage of planning anything. They just sit and moan that nothing good ever happens in their life.
Manifesting is more about the process to get there, a sense of self achievement in crossing off the tiny steps. It may not always work straight away as there are other influences which may impact on this. Don’t be afraid to revisit your goal and adjust it somewhat, especially in the early days of trying out this technique.
Are you willing to give it a go?
My first hint is to clear your mind from distractions, sit quietly and think about what you would like to manifest.
Please let me know if you need any assistance with this. We can organise a coaching session via skype or phone. Or, just give it a try keeping in mind these positive thoughts here:
8 THINGS TO GIVE UP
- Doubting Yourself
- Negative Thinking
- Fear of Failure
- Criticising Yourself and Others
- Negative Self Talk
- Fear of Success
- People Pleasing
Reaching Beyond Adversity
It is easy to believe that you can’t Reach Your Potential because of some adversity that may have happened in your life. You may have experienced a significant loss early in life such as the death of a loved one or major disruption through divorce of your parents. Many people will remember having to move house as a child and having to leave friends behind, and possibly the difficult time you had in re-establishing a friendship group in your new location.
I have worked with many clients who have been unfortunate enough to have been abused as children through physical, emotional or sexual abuse. This has obviously left significant scars and has resulted in the person concerned needing or choosing to seek individual supportive therapy to work through the impact of these issues. They will never know what life might have been like if they had not experienced this trauma or adversity early in life. Recent scientific research is showing that the development of the brain can be significantly impaired by early childhood trauma. But the good news is the neuro-plasticity of the brain allows repair work to be done through positive experiences and personal relationships later in life. It would be easy for the individual to give up and say that it is all too hard, and they will always be “like this”.
But this attitude means the challenging situation or adverse situation can become an excuse, not a reason for never quite making the highest standard you would love to set for yourself. It could be the excuse for never taking on a new experience where we do not have total confidence that we will succeed. It could prevent you from learning a new skill which could open a whole new set of doors in life.
Trying a new thing is uncomfortable by its very nature. A challenge is a challenge for that very reason. It takes us beyond our comfort zone and into the area of risk, where we may fail. But if we don’t experience some failure or lack of success, then we probably are not trying hard enough. There are very few new skills that everybody gets right the first time. Trying a new experience and not making it teaches valuable things. Discovering you hate a new experience is a valuable thing to learn. I vividly remember trying to learn to ski with spectacular lack of success. I tried a few more times, continuing to fail to master the skills required for me to even look mediocre on the slopes! Eventually I chose to pursue other interests but the experience was invaluable in helping me decide where my interests really lay and to understand why I thought I should try.
Most of us have watched young children start to take their first steps. None of them ever have complete success on the first attempt, beyond one, two or maybe three steps. The child invariably falls over and possibly cries. But parents don’t say “You can’t do that so don’t try again.” They pick the child up, encourage them to try again and continue to do so into the future. Eventually they learn to walk, and then to run! So it is with us as adults.
Marie Forleo reminds us, “Your past does not equal your potential”.
Marie runs an online course called B-School. The school has been reviewed in the past as teaching more about business than many postgraduate MBA courses in university. I have enrolled in the upcoming course because I have a vision to transform my business from working mainly in face-to-face counselling where I can only help one person at a time, to running a lot more workshops, conferences, retreats and online courses to be able to reach and work with lots more people. This requires a specific skill set, and my past attempts have not been spectacularly successful. In addition I have had my own personal experiences of adversity and trauma, which I sometimes used in days gone by as excuses to keep me stuck as a victim of my experience. Fortunately I grew beyond that and have now reached a much higher potential than I did prior to the adversities.
So in the interests of promoting a more positive future for both myself and you, I’m going public on my plans and my willingness to take a risk. I know I have the potential to do it and I am engaging with the best through Marie Forleo and Leonie Dawson to gain the skills and the support to get there. Going public in your intention is one of the first steps towards success.
I challenge you to do the same. So take a realistic step today towards the potential you KNOW you can reach. The first step doesn’t have to be big. You just need to take it.
Why don’t you report below in the comments what your first step is going to be and let us know how you get on? You can be guaranteed of support from me in your journey to Reach Your Potential.
It’s funny isn’t it to think about what gets us moving to get things done? I’m tired today but it feels like a ‘good’ tired. And why? Well, it comes from working hard to get something done by a deadline. I was getting my house ready to be photographed to be advertised to sell. We all live happily in our homes amongst clutter and normal family living – but when we sell, it seems the norm is we try to make our homes look like it has first made an appearance in Home Beautiful. So my bevy of activity was about de-cluttering, extra cleaning, washing windows and finally shoving the last vestiges of untidiness into cupboards before my refuge is displayed to the world on a real estate website.
So now, the photos are done and we just need to pretend that we live like this all the time – or at least until someone is sufficiently besotted to want to make an amazing offer!
Was I stressed? You bet I was! But it felt like some manageable stress. That is, it was short term, with a specific deadline and had clear and specific benefits to me. I felt satisfied that I had done the best job I could.
I can’t help but contrast this with the type of stress some people experience in everyday life. When we have constant stress – through work, family, relationships, financial or other ongoing issues – it can feel that we are on constant hyper-alert, or hyper-vigilance. The disadvantage of this is that the body has to deal with the stress hormones released naturally by our bodies when we are feeling under threat. This is the fight/flight mode – a hangover from our cave man days. Along came the wild animal to attack us – our body released adrenalin and we were ready to fight the threat or run away to keep safe.
Fast forward to 2014. If we are constantly threatened by psychological threats, rather than physical, our body still releases the hormones. We try to fight the threat – but we can’t always run away. This can lead to physical illness, burnt out, compassion fatigue (a lack of empathy for others) and a myriad of other concerns.
The solution? I know you’ve heard it all before – but it is simple really – GOOD SELF CARE!
Acknowledge that life can be stressful and take active steps to limit, reduce or eliminate the things that cause you to feel threatened and want to fight or flee. Be realistic – do you really need that thing or person if you feel constantly drained? Is the benefit of that job, relationship or activity far outweighing the costs? Does that habit of smoking or drinking too much, outweigh the health costs? And if you can’t reduce the threat or stress – then be sure to have some pretty good strategies for self care to manage the impacts.
Would you like to know more and do a self evaluation of the impact of stress on your life? It can affect you physically emotionally cognitively and behaviorally.
Want to know more about stress and how to manage it? Grab a copy of my free report,
The 7 Keys to Understanding Stress and How to Avoid It by signing up above right on this page.